The Best Kept Secrets at Coachella

Coachella Secrets

Ever been to Coachella before? Planning on making the trip to that magical desert oasis of a festival for the first time? Or, are you just simply curious about what Coachella is really all about? The following will have you more prepared than ever to have the time of your life at one of the greatest festivals on earth.

Coachella is one of the rare festivals that has something for just about every taste in music, food, drink, and anything else you can imagine. With a major emphasis on their art displays, and a passion for doing things differently from the herd, you’ll be sure to find something that tickles your fancy.

Coachella Yuma Tent

Not big on the greasy food options that are so commonly offered by festival vendors? Perhaps you’re craving something vegan and filling? The assortment of juice and smoothie vendors have you covered. Perfect for a quick power up that will put a pep in your step for hours. Not to mention the fiber from all the fruit and vegetables, which should help keep you as far away as possible from the porta-potties that have been cooking in the sun all day(s).

The Yuma tent is a deep house and techno haven. A pitch black enclosement with blinking red lights, thick smoke, smooth, wood flooring, and tasty house beats – talk about heavenly! Throw in the lifesaving air conditioning to cool down from the sweltering desert temperatures and it seems too good to be true. Two of the queens of techno, Nina Kraviz and Nicole Moudaber, will be gracing the stage with their presence this year, and Duke Dumont, The Magician, and many other heavy weights will be tearing the roof off as well.


When the temperatures get hot enough to seemingly singe your neck hairs, Sweet Clementine’s Popsicles will bring you back from the dead. With an amazing array of delectable flavors, and a carefully crafted menu that changes seasonally, the popsicles will give you that instant sugar boost to keep your feet moving all day and night long. Be sure to try any of their flavors that have strawberry and/or raspberry – just trust me.

It almost feels criminal to include the Do Lab on this list because EVERYONE needs to experience the stage at some point in their life, but if you haven’t checked it out before, YOU’RE MISSING OUT! Every year, hundreds, if not thousands, of festival goers travel to Coachella just to check out what the Do Lab has to offer. There are those who will never even leave that stage because the music is so fresh and exciting. Many artists have launched into stardom after performing at the Do Lab stage at Coachella, and you can be sure that they’ll always compile an elite crop of artists to perform there.

Coachella Do Lab

So, next time you feel like you’re being a basic festival bitch, or if you find yourself questioning whether Coachella is really all that, make sure to venture out and find some of your own hidden gems. The experience is always what you make it!

Here are the maps and set-times for Coachella:

Weekend 1 - Friday
Coachella Weekend 1 Friday 2016
Weekend 1 - Saturday
Coachella Weekend 1 Saturday 2016
Weekend 1 - Sunday
Coachella Weekend 1 Sunday 2016
Coachella Venue Map
Coachella Venue Map 2016
Coachella Camping Map
Coachella Camping Map 2016

About the author

The Irate Magistrate

The Irate Magistrate

Beyond fed up with the overall lack of creativity and talent that is especially apparent in certain sub-genres of electronic music. Aiming to bring justice to the fans of real, powerful music by mocking and forcing awareness of all things unworthy.

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